Now that we’re all grown up and don’t watch Jim Henson’s Muppet Show anymore (well, not that we’d admit) (Loxie sez: Hey, I will admit it and proudly!), the only thing better than Gonzo is finding out that Gonzo is really a beautiful woman who has perfected the art of nearly-nude roller skating and doing the splits. Or maybe you prefer a pants-less Swedish chef or tassel-twirling Miss Piggy? You may get all three if you attend the upcoming Go Go Rocket Productions rendition of MUPPETS BURLESQUE on Thursday December 15 at Funhouse Lounge in Portland.

This troupe of tassel-twirling glittery all stars will leave you with a desecrated childhood and a face stained with tears of laughter. Billed as “a weird and wonderful cabaret inspired by the creations of Jim Henson,” this burlesque event is hosted by local burlesque legend Vera Mysteria (as Miss Piggy!) and stars some of the best known burly acts from Portland, including Baby Le’Strange, Nina Nightshade and Rocket, showcasing their tributes to everything from Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem to The Dark Crystal. Nostalgic and naughty comedy continues with Mister Fogues as a saucy chef everyone will recognize, and the hungry one with blue fur gets crunk with his milk n cookie ladies! One thing is for sure: Go Go Rocket Productions knows how to put on a top notch spectacle, and you don’t want to miss this one!

Get your tickets here! Come to the early show, the late show, or both! These will sell out, so make haste! This is your last opportunity to see me on stage for a while. I truly hope I’ll be seeing you there, you weirdos.